Monday, May 3, 2010
Vienna has handcuffed Henry to the bed, against his will. When Barbara knocks on the door to talk about the wedding dress, Vienna lets her in. Vienna loves her dress, Henry is upset, and Barbara is determined to move on after what she saw.
Today’s episode was directed by Habib Azar and written by Leslie Nipkow.
Transcripts from TVMegasite
Henry: What is this? I didn't do this. Hey! Hey, somebody help!
Vienna: Oh, Henry.
Henry: You? No, no, no, no, no. You didn't do this.
Vienna: I am so, so glad that you are awake, Darling.
Henry: Maybe I'm not. Maybe this is just a nightmare.
Vienna: Shh. Don't fight it. Just lean back and relax and enjoy yourself, while I'll take care of all the hard things.
Henry: That's our safety word. Remember? And I'm not feeling very safe right now, so Pepparkakor! Would you just get the key and undo these, please?
Vienna: But the key's all the way over there.
Vienna: Oh, Henry, Henry, Henry. You can hide, but you can't run.
Henry: I'm, uh -- I'm losing the circulation in my wrists, Sweetheart. You want to undo these before we get some permanent damage?
Vienna: Oh, wait. We haven't had this much fun in a long time.
Henry: Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Vienna: There's no need to struggle, 'cause you're not going anywhere, you naughty, naughty boy.
Henry: Naughty. That's right. This is wrong. This is wrong. We decided -- we decided that we were not gonna have sex again until after marriage.
Vienna: No. You decided that. I didn't agree on that. I would never agree on something like that. That's un-Swedish.
Henry: When in Illinois.
Henry: But Liebchen.
Vienna: No. Stop talking. I want you, Henry, and I know you want me, too.
Henry: Not like this.
Vienna: Oh, your word says no, but your body says, "Ravish me!"
Henry: Really? Would you really take me against my will?
Vienna: Oh, you just leave your will for me.
Vienna: Are you ready?
Henry: Yes. No, no. We can't do this without protection.
[Knock on door]
Vienna: Ignore it. Really.
Henry: No. It could be house cleaning. They may walk in on us. Who is it?
Barbara: It's Barbara. I have the sketch of Vienna’s wedding gown and some fabric samples for her to check over.
Vienna: Oh, I'll be right there! Can't wait to see what you've done!
Henry: Vienna, no! You can't let her -- let her in here! No! At least let me go, please!
Vienna: Since when did you become so shy, huh? Hello, Barbara. I can't wait to see what you've done. May I?
Henry: Hello, Barbara.
Vienna: Is this beading?
Barbara: Yes. It's all beading, or you could have it without, if you prefer.
Vienna: Oh, with, absolutely. It is exquisite. You remember the thing I told you about.
Barbara: Yes. If by the time the wedding happens you need it, I can put panels over.
Vienna: Oh, yeah, yeah. I got it. I understand. Great idea. I want it to be a surprise. Can you just hide the sketches so Henry doesn't see them?
Barbara: Of course, of course. I also brought some fabric samples for you to look at. This one is quite expensive.
Vienna: Money's not a problem, is it, Henry?
Barbara: I think you should have whatever you want.
Vienna: Oh, God. I love being a bride! I'm gonna take this to the bathroom, where the light is much better. You just wait right here.
Barbara: No, no, no, no. I can’t.
Vienna: Oh, come on. Keep Henry company.
Henry: What?! Vienna, no! You can't leave me in this condition!
Vienna: When did you become such a prude? I'm sure Barbara has seen plenty of scandalous things in her time. Wait for me.
Barbara: I'm leaving.
Henry: Barbara, no! No! Please, don't go! You've got to get me out of this. Please!
Henry: Barbara. Barbara, please. I am not Houdini. Would you please get me out of these?
Barbara: If you haven't noticed, I'm not Houdini, either!
Henry: Look, the key is on the table! I'm begging you! I'm begging you, please! If you leave me here, I am at Vienna’s mercy, and she doesn't have any!
Henry: Hurry! Hurry! Look, I didn't sign on to this. Vienna did this to me when I was sleeping. It was the only way that she could get me to --
Barbara: Stop! Spare me the details!
Henry: I tried to use our safe word, but that didn't stop her at all!
Barbara: Shut up, Henry! Shut up, or I'll tell you, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna lock you back up with these, and I'll swallow the key!
Henry: Do you really hate me that much?
Vienna: I love them all! I really, really can't decide! I never realized how many different shades of white there is. And the way these fabrics move! Oh, I'm gonna be a princess on my wedding day!
Barbara: Yes. Just hold on to them for a little while, all right?
Vienna: Oh, my God! This is absolutely perfect. You're a genius! It's as if you're inside my head listening to every single thought I have. You're so attuned with everything that I love.
Barbara: Yes, everything for the bride. Just remember, the silk needs some special ordering.
Vienna: Oh, Barbara.
Barbara: Yes? Ooh!
Vienna: Thank you.
Vienna: Oh, Henry, my dress is going to be the most beautiful thing on this earth. I mean, Barbara, she may be old, but her fashion sense is just impeccable! I mean, she's more like a witch than a designer. Her dress is -- oh, it's gonna be beautiful. I can't wait for you to see it on me. Hang on a minute. What happened? How did you get out of the handcuffs?
Henry: The handcuffs?
Vienna: Oh, you have so many talents. You're an escape artist, too. Mr. Henry Houdini. And you're all red.
Henry: Yeah, imagine that.
Vienna: I know what to do to make you feel better. Let me tie you back up again.
Henry: I'm not in the mood, Vienna.
Vienna: Oh, come on! You're always in the mood. At least you used to be. Fine, fine. Let's switch places. Officer, cuff me.
Henry: Stop it.
Vienna: Oh, come on! You be the cop, and I'll be the very bad girl. You can do anything to punish me.
Henry: No, Vienna, stop it! I mean it!
Vienna: What's wrong with you? When did it become such a chore for you to make love to me?
Henry: We had a deal -- no sex until after marriage.
Vienna: No! I never agreed to that. That's a terrible idea.
Henry: Well, it's tradition.
Vienna: And when did you start to care about tradition?
Henry: Since you went and decided to get pregnant without even telling me.
Barbara: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You are not gonna fall apart, not over the likes of Henry Coleman! He's just a man, and you can have any man, Barbara. You can have any man you want. If I want a man, I can have a man, a man that's far more appropriate than Henry that I don't have to share. Ha. Katie? Hi. It's Barbara. Are you free? Oh, good. I was just thinking about your new matchmaking skills, and I thought, "Well, gee, I've got a bit of time on my hands," so if the offer is still open, I'm in.